Things I'm Afraid To Tell You

Well hello there (insert smile and wink). I'm Heather. This is my personal blog and it's been a little while since I've spent some time sharing here (insert sincere heartfelt apology). There are many factors that have contributed to my absence, some of which I'll share below. While I was drafting this post I stumbled across, this post, and it struck a very similar chord to what I had already written, so I've decided to include my own 'things I'm afraid to tell you' bit below. I'm sharing because I feel that quite often this very weird alternate universe that is blogging can feel and seem like non-reality, be perceived as all fun and games, or that blogging is this competitive comparison rat race to obtain, money, clothes, land a job, or social recognition (not so). We all have our own hurdles, weaknesses, and struggles, and this post is really for me to take down the curtain of fear of vulnerability and share who am I and my thought processes that don't get published.

Here goes.....

• I struggle with personal failure on an almost daily basis. Although I'm very aware of my God given innate talents and abilities, the recent fall-out of my marriage of almost ten years to my high-school sweetheart (which two amazing kiddos were the product of) has left me devastated and lost with how to move forward.

• There are many days I don't put much thought into what I wear. Those are the outfit posts that don't make it to the blog. We style bloggers don't always look like our outfit posts.

• I recently landed a full-time job out of necessity surrounding the situation mentioned above, but doing so has meant shelving finishing school which terrifies me to the core. My mind now reels with how I will juggle supporting my kiddos and going back to school. 

•  I have been slacking on reading my Bible. Big time. And it shows. I've compromised in many areas in my life I shouldn't because I'm keeping myself busy and distracted with other things. I have the desire to grow my relationship with Jesus, but my flesh often wins out. 

• I just wrote a bullet that I completely erased for fear of getting completely burned for. Maybe I'll grow some nerve and share it someday.

• I am forgetful and scatterbrained (thanks in part to genetics from my father) and have been my whole life. It's something I really really dislike and have been working on curbing, for, well, let's just say a good chunk of time. I project that I'm punctual and organized, but deep down I'm not. Small example: I drove off with my coffee cup on the roof on my car yesterday.......for the eleventh time. Good grief.

Exhale.....I have many more I could share, but that was tough. I hope it wasn't too much or too heavy...it's just honest....and I'm all about honest. Have you ever shared a similar post? Would you? I'd love for you to share and leave a link to yours in the comments or just share below if you'd like.

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